This is a story. A true story of a mom’s first few hours of summer vacation. I resurrect these words every June to remind myself, well, it could be worse. I mean, I’ve had one son brings home a gallon sized zipped lock bag full of guppies in his backpack on the last day of school and another has filed past with about 2000 pounds of linebacker behind him. But in all honesty, its those nerf gun battle-Hannah conquering it all-days in my memories that are priceless. I would welcome them back in a heartbeat. So to all of you, the moms who know what the last day of school means, I mean truly means, I raise a glass of Merlot to you today, tomorrow, and 80 nights of summer that follow. Salute!
9:30 am- The warning has been issued. Lift the lid or pay the consequences. All for one/ one for all. Piddle on the seat…all those with “kibbles and bits” clean the toilets.
9:50 am- Check mouse trap…caught another one. Scream for Zak. Smiles while he releases trap and examines corpse. Observation from Zak: mice do not have time to lick lips clean of peanut butter when caught in trap.
11:45 am- No one ‘fesses up’ to the newly discovered yellow liquid droplets on toilet seat…4 toilets, 3 boys, 3 toilet brushes … toilets spotless
1:25 pm- First episode of snickering in reference to male body parts…documented first eye rolling of summer by Hannah.
2:53 pm- Blood drawn…dog chain swung by Zak smacks Nick in head. Investigate. Conclusion: Accident First Aid applied… time out given.
3:13 pm- 2.5 lb bag of M&M’s spill across floor…race between kids to consume before Duncan. First loud whistle from fingers to maintain order this summer.
4:27 pm Hannah proclaims “I’m bored”
7:14 pm James Bond theme resonates throughout house…major Nerf gun battle erupts…foam bullets flying…Sam mumbles Buonas Noches Amigo… shoots Nick in back with 16 shot rapid fire Nerf gun…picking foam bullets out of boiling noodles on stovetop…Hannah joins battle… new Bond girl??
7:46 pm Battle ends… Hannah triumphs … nothing spells (or smells) V.I.C.T.O.R.Y. like spraying brother’s protective athletic cup for baseball with Wild Honeysuckle Body Splash… Sweet Smell of Honeysuckle Victory permeates house, boys, Nick’s cup….
8:20 pm Merlot…
11:09 pm Calendar located… first day of school : 70 more days … tick tock tick tock.